Procrastinator’s Guide to Applying for Fish Camp

Part 1: Personal Information

  • Fill out your name and contact information. Don’t stress, you can do it.
  • Try to exaggerate your extracurricular involvement as much as possible. Hopefully you were in a FLO. If you were in a FLO, you are in. It could also really help to mention your sorority, men’s organization, or your history as a camp counselor. If you don’t put anything, they will think you are a friendless loser, so just make something up if you have actually done nothing in the past year.
  • If you have been a counselor before and did a bad job, just don’t mention your previous camp in your Camp History and apply to be an inexperienced counselor again. That way, nobody goes looking for your evaluations and sees your awful reviews, and as a bonus, you won’t actually have any responsibility.

 

Part 2: Select Your Availability

  • Remember to lie about your availability and select every session regardless of if you have summer school or not. This will increase your chance of getting selected!
  • If you want to have the fun of Fish Camp but don’t want to attend any of the Sunday Developmental Programs or other trainings, apply for Pick Up! Then cross your fingers and hope that someone gets really sick or doesn’t make grades so you can swoop in just in time to pierce your eyebrow and get to Lakeview.

 

Part 3: Essay Responses

  • Be sure to make yourself stand out by talking about how passionate you are. This is the one thing you have over every other person applying to be a Fish Camp Counselor.
  • Even though the person reading your application will know that you are only applying to make counselor friends and get some cool apparel, it is best if you pretend that you are applying to help the incoming freshmen. You get an extra 5 points for every time you use the phrase “universally accepting environment” as a way to express your willingness to help the campers.
  • If you mention Iceberry Blue in a funny way in the middle of one of your essays, they will know you are already in on counselor jokes and it will automatically make them like you more.
  • If you are still struggling and find yourself in a time crunch, just fill in this helpful mad lib and submit it! It will look basically the same as everyone else’s application and put you on an even playing field.

When I first arrived at Reed Arena for my first day of camp, I was extremely      (adjective)     . I was surrounded by college students with      (color)      hair wearing      (weird article of clothing)     , and I didn’t know what to make of it. I was walked in to Reed accompanied by a guy holding a stick with a      (noun)      duct taped to the top that he kept waving around      (adverb)     . I      (past tense action verb)      into a large group of      (adjective)      incoming freshmen and started to learn the yells. After arriving at Lakeview, I was still feeling a little bit      (adjective)      but there were several counselors who went out of their way to talk to me, and that made me feel so      (adjective)     . Over time, I learned more about Texas A&M and our great traditions, and and it filled my heart with      (emotion)     . I understand the importance of Fish Camp and would love to be a part of this amazing group of people.

-Gigsaw Puzzle

Corps of Cadets: The Musical

In case you may have missed it on Facebook and Twitter, we’re producing Corps of Cadets: The Musical this spring!

Looking for a great date idea with your boot-chaser? Or a ‘guys night out’ with your ‘ol lady? Look no further than Corps of Cadets: The Musical, a dazzling, toe-tapping extravaganza. You are sure to be humming the tunes of ‘Khaki Love Makes Me So Blue’, ‘Get Me to the Quad on Time’, and ‘I Cogitated a Cogitation’ as you leave the theatre.

Written by Cadet Robert Bannon ’16 for the enjoyment of cadets and non-regs alike, proceeds will benefit Aggie Rings for Veterans and the Lone Survivor Foundation. Help us raise money, awareness, and appreciation for our veterans!

Make it to our 2pm show, or our 7pm final production on Sunday, May 1st. Or come to both! Marvel in the talent of the actors, laugh with cadets and non regs alike, and most importantly, support our veterans!

Tickets are currently on sale at the MSC Box Office!

How to stay in the loop:

Join the Facebook Event and invite your friends!

Follow @CorpsMusical on Twitter

Audition for a part!  Cadets and non-regs welcome!

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Hope to see you all on May 1st!

Any questions regarding the musical can be directed to CorpsMusical@gmail.com

BREAKING: Mandatory Corps Enrollment for Class of 2020

In the biggest announcement since the “Lead By Example” halftime card trick, President Young has announced that all incoming freshmen will serve one mandatory year in the Corps of Cadets. Response across campus has been a mixture of excitement, extreme relief, and frightening rage.

Brigadier General Joe Ramirez, Commandant of the Corps of Cadets, when questioned about the origin of this new policy said, “I think it’s fantastic. I had nothing to do with it, surprised the hell out of me, but I like it. I may finally have the largest Corps in history now and show those try-hards from West Point what’s up!”

Alexandra Morgan, High School senior and soon-to-be Psychology major from Dallas, is less than thrilled. “I just really don’t want to spend a whole year wearing that uniform. I mean, yeah I go to a private school now and we have to wear uniforms, but all khaki is totes gross!” Alexandra previously had plans to rush, but now must figure out a way to do so secretly, as everyone is telling her the Corps and Greek life don’t mix.

It is unclear what current members of the Greek community think, as neither TFM nor The Odyssey have published an article on the topic.

Fish Rodriguez of Squadron 12 was more concerned with housing than anything. “I mean, yeah, I’ll have more fish to smoke, but where are they gonna put everyone? We don’t have enough room as it is!”

An employee of the Office of Admissions, who wishes to remain anonymous, delivered this shocking revelation: “The incoming freshman class has actually gotten bigger. Do you remember the College of Engineering’s goal of 25 thousand students by the year 2025? We’re actually going to meet that next year.” This employee thinks they know why too. “We are pretty sure the Corps just taught the University what magic tricks they must use to recruit. I mean, it makes sense. How else does an organization even current members don’t seem to like keep getting bigger?”

Logistics regarding housing, feeding, and training of the vast number of incoming fish has not been released. Stand by for further announcements from the Office of the President.

-Corpsespondant


PS Buy your tickets now to the first run of Corps of Cadets: The Musical!

This article was written by a fan. If you or anyone you know may be interested in contributing a post or idea to the site, feel free to share it with us or ask us questions at themugdown@gmail.com!


 

Honoring Deceased Found to be Great Inconvenience

As students begin to accept that the spring semester is indeed in full swing, the Aggie schedule is moving at full speed. On Tuesday night, Aggies once again gathered in Academic Plaza to honor those students who have passed away, through the sacred and somber tradition of Silver Taps. For some, Silver Taps is a special time to demonstrate the unity and support of the student body for fellow members of the Aggie family. For others, Silver Taps is something you do with your FLO or camp once or twice, or just something that you do because Ben Stuart said you should. It is widely agreed that attending one is sufficient, and if you’ve been to one, you’ve been to them all.

Others, who claim to see the importance of the event, but still do not attend, are able to come up with a myriad of excuses for missing the sacred ceremony. Many students find themselves unmotivated to stand in the cold for forty-five minutes on a Tuesday night. Who can blame anyone for having tired legs after standing up for a straight 7 hours of banner holding by the MSC? Organizational PR is, after all, a much easier and more convenient way to express your support for Texas A&M, compared to Silver Taps.

Other examples for staying home instead of going to Silver Taps have much stronger bases.

“I just have a lot to study, that’s all. First round of exams start tomorrow and I’m already way behind,” dedicated students say. These are often the same diligent students found spending uninterrupted hours scrolling through Instagram or streaming Making a Murderer while in the library on Tuesday afternoons.

“It’s just too late. By the time Silver Taps rolls around, I’m too tired to make my way to campus and stand around for an hour in the middle of the night,” the over-involved explain. This is the typical answer of a student, who, at least weekly, has no problem running two miles at midnight after their committee meeting gets out especially late.

Some have blamed the twenty-one gun salute for being too loud, or too jarring. Others have claimed the ceremony is “boring”. “What am I supposed to even think about while all that’s happening? The precious fragility of life? The love, unity, and sorrow that we, as members of the same student body, should show each other in such a gentle time for mourning? No thanks, that’s too much for me. Can’t stay focused for that long.”

It is true that being there for your fellow students and the families of those grieving the loss of a young Aggie means facing the staggering discomfort of standing in the cold for less than an hour once every month, but–as difficult as that may be–isn’t it worth it?

 

-Bacon & Ags

 

Howdy:

Silver Taps will be held at 10:30pm in Academic Plaza.

Please take the time to attend to show respect and support for the families that are grieving. This is what makes Texas A&M unique, let’s keep it that way.

December Graduate Already Complaining About New Army

December Graduate Already Complaining About New Army

The Mugdown sat down with recent graduate Chip “Bucky” Reynolds for a Q&A session to discuss the changing culture at Texas A&M.

 

Mugdown: So, how have things changed at A&M since you graduated a few weeks ago?

Reynolds: Everything’s different. These damn kids don’t barely even go to the same school as I did. When I was a freshman, things were simpler. Kyle Field weren’t some big, fancy, brick temple dedicated to the god of marketing. It was a cold, Siberian prison made out of nothing but concrete, and bat s**t.

M: Well you have to expect that buildings will be changed over time. How about the students, have they changed?

R: The kids these days have it easy. Way back in my day we didn’t have any of the fancy-pants luxuries they have now. Hell, I saw an attractive girl in a Corps uniform the other day. Wasn’t none of that in my day- we hazed out any girl that didn’t have at least as much chest hair as the rest of us. How are cadets these days supposed to bond with their buddies through the shared uncomfortable experience of repressed homoeroticism if there’s damn girls hanging around?

M: So you think students have started taking some aspects of campus life for granted in the time since you graduated, a few weeks ago?

R: Of course I do. If you don’t believe me, just go over to Northgate! It’s downright unnatural! Shouldn’t ever be anything but beer served at The Chicken. Walking through the cold to the Dry Bean for shots builds character. And now there’s these frat boys hanging around all the time, they’re ruining The Chicken! Wearing their Sperry’s and neon polo shirts, I’ve even seen some of ‘em ‘pop their collars’, the nerve! T’ain’t right.

M: What are some things that you got to experience in college that current students will not?

R: Way back in my college days things were better, there was actually grass left in a few places on campus, we still played t.u. in football, and you could call a girl a ‘broad’ unironically. But now, I’m hearing about all these changes that don’t sit well with me. The administration is trying to change the University Seal, that’s outrageous! Back in my day we didn’t even know there was a seal. And don’t even get me started on this 25×25 thing. I’m not sure what it is but I don’t like it. Can’t trust something that’s got a math problem for a name.

M: The Mugdown is a pretty new organization on campus, how do you feel about us?

R: Your name is stupid, no one mugs down anymore, the kids won’t get the reference. Besides, we don’t need no students hanging around complaining and being overly critical ‘bout everything anyone tries to do. That’s what parents and ol’ Ags like me are for. When I was in school, if we wanted to complain about something, we did it the way an Aggie ought to: drunkenly in a Taco Bell parking lot.

M: Well you clearly have strong feelings about the direction the school is headed. Do you have any ideas for solutions to the problems you see?

R: You’re clearly a pale-ass, new-army chimp. Aggies don’t find solutions. That’s what makes us Aggies, we just build bigger buildings to house the problems. We sit stubbornly in our mistakes until everyone else decides we’re right. If we want this university to be better, we need to go backwards: be only an agricultural and mechanical school again. Get rid of girls and all that liberal, hippy crap. Force little non-reg b*****s to harden up and join the Corps. But only ol’ Ags like me who’ve been out in the harsh, real world for a long time are willing to say it.

 

The Mugdown would like to thank Chip “Bucky” Reynolds for letting us interview him. We also want to congratulate Chip on his recent graduation with a degree in philosophy and a minor in theatre. We wish him the best of luck as he attends graduate school for art history next year at the University of Texas.
-Chophouse Sweater Burger

The Bandwagon Aggie’s Guide to Basketball

The Bandwagon Aggie’s Guide to Basketball

There you have it, Ags. The Texas A&M Men’s Basketball team finally cracked (then uncracked) the Top 5 in this week’s AP and Coaches Poll, marking their highest position in school history. This means one thing and one thing only: We are a basketball school now and Kentucky can kiss our asses. Just like many other students, you are probably wondering how this happened so quickly and how one might become a follower without looking like a bandwagon fan, even though odds are good that you probably are one. We are here to break down Aggie Basketball as simply as we can.

 

What do you wear to a basketball game?

We always #WhiteOutReed, but why white? No one knows. Ladies, you cannot wear cowboy boots and a sundress to a basketball game. This is not football season.

 

Players to Know

Armor Caruso Davis Dobbins HoggHouse
Jones TBD

 

Yells

The Reed Rowdies are being touted as one of this year’s best student sections in all of college basketball. You will find students heavily concentrated behind both baskets, accompanied by the Yell Leaders. Technically, every student is a member of the Reed Rowdies, but there is an actual organization with officers who are in charge of getting the students ready for the next big game. They sell shirts on campus and are in charge of promoting the hell out of games.

 

Free Throw Yells

 

        • Everyone stays absolutely quiet and still, then they blurt out noises and flail their arms around just before the player takes his shot.
        • Each student waves their arms around like they are pretending to do the backstroke while wailing, “Woooaaahhh! Wooooaahhh!”
        • Don’t forget about holding up your Acme® Brick Sign and Shouting “Brick!” repeatedly, and in the ear of the person next to you.
        • One of the more popular yells starts with holding one’s hands off to one side of their body and wiggling their fingers, quickly switching their hands to the other side just before the shot.
        • There’s also something about newspapers? Our expert doesn’t even know this one.

 

Misc. Yells

      • Loud shouting of the word, “Ball!” at random happens when the opposing team is looking for a player to inbound the ball to.
      • When an opposing player fouls out, shouting “Left!” or “Right!” in unison with the player’s footsteps as he slinks to the bench helps the uneducated opponent make his short journey. Then, when he sits down, shouting–you guessed it–“Sit down!”
      • The crowd favorite requires letting out a series of profanities and exasperated noises under one’s breath after Danuel House takes and misses yet another three point shot.
      • When any of the players shoot (and make) a three pointer, both ends of the court jump in the air following the Yell Leader’s command. Don’t worry about jumping at the wrong time – the less in-unison, the better. C’mon, act like you’ve been there.

 

Anything else noteworthy

  • Nothing says “family friendly fun” like a coordinated booty-shaking and hair-flipping from a gang of college girls in velvet yoga pants and tiny tops at every break in the basketball action. The Yell Leaders are still present, but even Steven Lanz’s dreamy smile is no match for hips that don’t lie.
  • Basketball fans have been given the luxury of sitting down during timeouts. That’s right. In fact, you could stay seated the entire time if you’d like.
  • Just like our football counterpart, we are not good at winning when we are at our best. Leading up to this Saturday’s matchup against the Iowa State Cyclones, the Aggies were undefeated in the SEC and ranked #5 in the nation until they were handed their first loss from the Arkansas Razorbacks on Wednesday.

Welcome to the bandwagon, Ags, and don’t forget that Reed Arena is, indeed, the same place where you go to Breakaway on Tuesday’s. Maybe that explains the hang out app

 

-Marco OVO Queso Polo & E. King Trill

PS: Thanks to RCB05 for the feature image. The intern really loves his stuff… never shuts up about him really.

Study Abroad at Sugarloaf Mountain

Texas A&M University is offering an exciting new study abroad program located at and around Sugarloaf Mountain. The program will be 14 weeks long and will provide students with the opportunity to earn course credit while immersing themselves in a unique culture. Garth Yannick, a sophomore Biology Major, is thrilled at the opportunity to do something so adventurous and challenging.

“I’ve seen so many pictures of my friends at this really beautiful and scenic spot; it looks like such a beautiful part of the world,” Yannick said. “I knew that someday I would have to travel there and experience it for myself.”

Sugarloaf’s exotic culture and rugged terrain can seem quite daunting, but Bethany Mathel, Study Abroad director, says that the program is possible for every single student at Texas A&M.

“The 500 ft. mountain is rich with natural and historic artifacts. Just last week, one of my students found a fossilized flannel, a coffee cup, and a Breakaway backpack tag. We were able to date them to a couple days prior, when a Bible study came to have coffee at sunrise. Truly fascinating that people do that.”

The program will have a record low cost, allowing many students to experience the wonder of this incredible feat of natural creation. The suggested packing list is included here, for the convenience of our readers:

A 70 liter external Backpack

3 gallons of water per person per day

Made-ready meals

A camera with a minimum 1 terabyte of memory for all of the pictures that will be taken

A gopro for those adventurous wide angle photos

A backup camera because Sugarloaf photographs EXTREMELY well (extra credit awarded if it is a polaroid)

A zero degree sleeping back for the altitude change

A machete

A siphon coffee maker

 

-5K FOR YELL

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