12 Mugdown Articles You Didn’t Know Were Real
Wow! Who knew The Mugdown was telling the truth the whole time? Apparently SGA did!
Now that The Mugdown has been explicitly and irreversibly classified as a real news outlet source by the election commission, and, consequently, by SGA as a whole, check out these completely true and factually accurate articles from recent semesters:
- Evans Set To Be Demolished for Mini-Golf Course
- Beutel Announces Official Switch to Essential Oils
- CAPS Introduces Group Therapy Battle Royale
- Young Rips Steam Tunnel Exploration as Irresponsible, Breach of Pact with Evil Presence Deep Within
- Honor Code Changed to “Aggies Do Not Lie, Cheat, or Use GroupMe”
- MSC to Require Playing Test Certification in Order to Play Flag Room Piano
- BCS Utilities Debuts New “You’ll Get Used to It” Slogan
- On-Campus Hotel Bar to Accept Dining Dollars
- Texas A&M To Accept Transfer Credits From Local Tutoring Services
- Aggie Spirit to Require Two Forms of ID for Boarding
- Christian Men’s Orgs Named Group One Carcinogen by American Cancer Association
- Human Sacrifice To Become Valid Form of Payment at B&N Starbucks
— Ring Chunks
No, Ring Chunks is feeling fine, really. Yeah, it was a long journey to the bottom of the pitcher, but she knew that coming into her dunk. That’s why she made sure to let it sit overnight and pick a light beer she didn’t care for and – oh. Oh no. Um, okay, let’s just move her here to the trash can – wait, why is it full? Oh God, Ring Chunks, just keep it together until we can reach the toilet – NO! NOT IN THE KITCHEN SINK!