Survey: Only Thing That Scares Students More Than Loneliness Is Commitment

A recent study conducted by Texas A&M Counseling & Psychological Services (CAPS) delved deep into the Texas A&M student psyche to determine what the student body truly fears. Researchers have determined that, despite the high proportion of students that struggle with loneliness, an even greater number are afraid of commitment. The survey, which consisted of multiple-choice questions and short answer responses, showed an unlikely level of similarity among the student body.

A multiple-choice section of the survey delivered some of the most surprising results. When asked the following question, 90% of students chose D.

What do you struggle with the most as a college student? 

A) Fear of not getting a job after college

B) Loneliness/Isolation

C) Fear of failure

D) When anyone gets close to me, I just push them away. Oh my god, I’ve never felt so alone. I joined a student org on campus to make friends, but I can’t even bring myself to go to the social tonight. It just seems like such a big obligation, and do I really feel that lonely? I’ll just go to the next one. I’m too busy anyway, so I should probably stay at home and maybe get some work done. Even though I haven’t actually gone to an org event this semester, it’s just because I’m busy. That’s all. Yeah, I’ll go next time.

Sarah Ruberman, a psychology department intern hired to conduct the study, said to The Mugdown, “I made small talk about Halloween coming up with some students in the waiting room before the survey, and multiple students told me their planned scary gag costume was just dressing as themselves and calling it ‘Loneliness.'” Despite this, Ruberman said none of them had any actual plans to do anything for Halloween. “That’s when I knew we were on to something,” she said.

Below are some of the most illuminating free responses, with names and other identifying content removed for privacy.

Respondent 7759

Responding to a question about what prevents them from enjoying college to the fullest:

“I always had plenty of friends in high school and was always going out and doing fun stuff. Here at A&M, though, this hasn’t been the case. It’s not like I’ve become less likable all of a sudden; I just can’t bring myself to make plans with my lab group like I see everyone else doing. Imagining doing anything other than flopping down in bed and letting a cathartic scream out with my face jammed into my pillow after a full day of classes makes me shudder. It’s like I’m perpetually running on empty. The weekends aren’t any better for this. Imagine telling people I could go out for mimosas and brunch on Sunday, only to feel like a husk of a human being when the time comes. Being lonely sucks, but at least I’m the one running the show this way.”

Respondent 1212

Responding to a question about what would most likely to keep them up at night:

“Commitment. Point blank, this makes my skin crawl. After my last romantic partner left me high and dry after winter break, I can’t imagine letting myself feel a connection with anyone else. All that time together and energy used up responding to drunk texts, not to mention money spent going out for Chick-fil-A Every. Single. Night. wasted, just to wind up doing it again? No thanks. Don’t get me wrong, when the leaves start to fall off the trees, I feel the biological drive to find a partner like everyone else, and seasonal depression rearing its ugly head only compounds this, but I refuse to fall into the trap of cuffing season ever again. The whole thing is probably an elaborate ruse by Nestle or something to get me to buy more hot chocolate and fuzzy socks to share with a construction science major whose emotional intelligence is dwarfed by that of my beagles.”

Sadly, despite seemingly concrete findings, the study is left in departmental limbo as researchers moved onto new projects before taking the leap to present their findings to University administration.

 

— Plaid Libs and CTE-Walk