Local Coffee Shops Implement Confessional Corners

Local coffee shops have begun to implement confessional corners for Christian students who seek to engage in intentional conversations with their male and female counterparts. 

These confessional corners are designed to provide a casual space for intimate and personal conversations to occur in a coffee shop without distracting surrounding customers with details of, say, one’s fall from grace during last semester’s study abroad. This also prevents patrons from interrupting other patrons’ study sessions with stories of their drunken hookups in Hullabaloo Hall during freshman year. 

“I am so glad coffee shops are taking advantage of these!” said junior Desmond Grant, a 2020 Impact co-chair. “I can use these confessional corners for sharing my testimony, praying with freshmen, and even having DTRs! I wish they would have added these sooner. Now when people see me go in and out, they’ll have no doubt about my spiritual devotion.”

Results have been positive regarding the usage of these new spaces. Many coffee shops have seen an increase in business, and some have even started serving drinks in the confessional for those engaged in lengthier conversations. 

Early reports indicate that local Catholics are ecstatic about the new confessional corners, as it finally includes them in relevant Christian Bubble stereotypes. 

 

—Longboard of Regents