You Won’t Believe Why This Guy Chose to Go to A&M
1. It made the most sense economically.
2. It is top-ranked for his chosen field of study.
3. It is centrally located between Austin and Houston.
4. He was impressed by the friendliness of the student body.
5. He thinks participating in all the traditions might be fun.
6. He enjoys wearing the color maroon.
7. He thinks Reveille is really cute.
8. He thought College Station offered sufficient dining and entertainment options.
NEXT IN THIS SERIES: You Won’t Believe Why This Guy Hated A&M
—Heldenfalls
Once an average student eons ago, Heldenfalls committed some unknown sin against the Aggie gods and has since been burdened with a strange punishment: She is forced to carry her backpack to the top of the infamous Heldenfels stairs only to fall back to the bottom again over and over for all eternity. Though this may seem like a horrible fate, the philosophy department argues that Heldenfalls’ endless task represents the absurd heroism of the human condition. Each atom of that backpack, each mineral flake of those concrete stairs, in itself forms a world. The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a woman’s heart. One must imagine Heldenfalls happy.