The 6 Best Places to Poop on Campus (No. 2 Will Inspire You)
6.) Top Floor of Harrington Tower
The bathrooms here are clean, and the aesthetics are pleasing. Plus, you get that familiar rush from defecating at an altitude! Not a lot of people use these bathrooms–especially at night–so they are perfect for those late-night-away-from-home craps! Flush away!
5.) Sbisa
These bathrooms are nicely renovated, but that’s not even the best part. The great thing about taking a dump in Sbisa is that there is a $10 cover charge. Now that’s a premium poop!
4.) The MSC
Hear us out: the bathrooms are always really clean, and they make you feel like you’re going potty at a business conference. These bathrooms can be pretty crowded sometimes, so they are not ideal for those who suffer from stage fright. Pooping here means you can listen to KANM faintly playing over the sound system, which is the only time anyone ever actually listens to KANM.
3.) University Golf Course
The restrooms in the clubhouse are probably okay. They are usually not crowded, we would bet. Anyway, there’s a cluster of trees behind the number 11 green which we strongly recommend. There is something so refreshing about returning to your roots and dropping a deuce on the dewy, freshly cut grass. Ahh, nature.
2.) H2O Fountain
Two words: personal bidet.
1.) The Train Tracks
Oh come on, don’t be a wuss! It’s fun! The railroad is a great place for going number 2 when you are in a rush. Although it gets crowded around here sometimes, don’t let the regulars frighten you away: this is a top-notch spot and one of Aggieland’s greatest secrets.
Well there it is, our definitive list! We are lucky to go to a school that offers such a diverse selection of restroom locations. Have any suggestions? We would love to hear what you think! Send your favorite places to poop to [email protected].
-Bacon & Ags
It’s Sunday morning and you’ve woken up hungover and confused. “Man, last night’s house party was one for the books,” you think as you try and recall something, anything, about the party. The smell of bacon floats in from the kitchen, and you stumble over to see who’s cooking. You stand there in bewilderment— Bacon & Ags has cleaned up all of the empty bottles, cans, and Solo cups. He has cinnamon rolls warming in the oven, bacon on the stovetop, and an assortment of fruits on the table. You stutter, “Wow… I… uh… well,” but he cuts you off. “I just love a good brunch,” he says. “And since you threw such a great party, I thought the least I could do was clean it up and cook us some brunch! Here, I made some quiche— have some!”