FLO Counselor Disgraced After Asking Corps Member with Boots If They Were a Freshman
Kelly Maroon, a sophomore member of FEAR (Freshmen Excelling at Racquetball), has been suspended by the Freshmen Leadership Advisory Council for asking a senior Corps member if he was a freshman.
“I was just trying to go to class, and I don’t have time to be interrupted by a non-reg,” Grant Allen, the senior in question, said. “Non-regs should take the time to educate themselves on the important symbolism of our uniforms.”
Maroon defended her actions and will be appealing the suspension once her emotional well being improves.
“Why should I care what color their belt is?” Maroon said. “They wear the same thing every day. It’s not my fault that I’m khaki-blind.”
Maroon is the tenth FLO counselor that has been suspended this week. Other cases have involved counselors trying to recruit students with Aggie Rings and one young-looking professor.
— 12th Baby
During an A&M home football game, a beautiful baby was born to the most Redass of parents. While the other babies laid in their cribs and slept, this baby stood proudly on top of its bedding. Doctors said it was a scientific enigma: the first known infant born with fully working legs at the time of birth. The baby stood for two hours, refusing to sit or lay down. As the home football game concluded with an Aggie win over TU, the baby laid down and fell asleep. The baby could not stand anymore no matter how hard doctors tried. That was until it was a week later and the Aggies were playing once more at home. The baby stood up again, earning the name as 12th Baby.