An Interview with the Architect behind Zachry

The Mugdown’s interview team obtained an exclusive opportunity to speak to the architect behind the Zachry Engineering Education Complex’s beautiful 2018 expansion. What follows is a transcript of this illuminating conversation.

Smell Leader: To start, what exactly inspired the Learning Stairs in Zach? A lot of students are curious about the design.

Zachry Architect: You see, ever since my girlfriend left me for an engineer, I have devoted my life to inconveniencing engineers as much as possible. That’s why I made the Learning Stairs into a humiliation ritual. Sit on the edge of them, and your back will arch like those logarithmic curves you all love so much. Sit on them criss-cross applesauce, with your backpack and papers strewn beside you, and you’ll get a glimpse of what it’ll be like to be homeless after you graduate with no job prospects. I made sure that it is scientifically impossible to be comfortable on those stairs.

Smell Leader: Wow, amazing! I didn’t know so much thought went into them! Now, I want to talk about a slightly lesser-known part of Zachry: the Moon Ring Room. 

Zachry Architect: Ooh, I love talking about this! That’s right folks, there’s an Aggie Ring that has gone to the moon in a room in Zach. To spite all you engineers, I made the room as boring-looking as possible, and it has worked perfectly. No one even knows what’s in there! Everyone just knows it as that one ugly-looking space near the Starbucks.

Smell Leader: Hmm. I never knew that! It’s amazing how much effort you architects put in. Now, I’d like to talk abou-

Zachry Architect: HAH! You have no idea! You know, I was forced to design a beautiful facade for the building, so you know what I did? I rotated it! Now, everyone on University Drive sees a grey rectangle, while my breathtaking view, complete with lights and a path to the entrance, is facing Spence Street. Spence Street! Have you ever seen anybody use the Spence Street entrance? I haven’t!

Smell Leader: That’s some really interesting stuff. Thanks for talking to us today! We appreciate hearing from the mastermind behind one of Texas A&M’s most iconic buildings.

Zachry Architect: Yeah, shut up, you dumb engineer. I hope you enjoy being ogled at by all those tour groups while in your electricity and magnetism lab. I put all that glass there for a reason. Bite me.

 

— Smell Leader