Aggie Spirit Bus Hits Little Girl
Last week, an Aggie Spirit bus hit a 12-year-old girl on her ride home from middle school. After the mangled remains of her pink bike with streamers were removed from the street and the girl was airlifted to the nearest hospital, traffic was delayed for a total of 25 minutes, leaving students everywhere annoyed by the buses’ delays.
“I just don’t understand why she had to be hit right before my stop,” said BIMS major Abby Pathy. “It’s a sweltering 72 degrees, and I can only hold my six-pound backpack for so long before my back starts to hurt.”
“My coffee dribbled on me, and I didn’t even have time to go home and get my Tide pen,” said fellow student Hitin Ran.
When the parents asked for Texas A&M University to cover any medical costs resulting from the crash, the only reply they got was an email that read, in full, “Kick rocks.”
The Mugdown was able to get a statement from the girl asking why she had to get hit at 2:30 p.m. on a Wednesday. Her only response was a muffled groan from the inside of a full-body cast.
— Boot In My Mouth
Some people were born to lead. Others were born to follow. And then there’s Boot in My Mouth, who has made a proud career out of enthusiastically agreeing with absolutely anything said by anyone with even the slightest hint of authority. Professor, boss, random guy in line at Chick-fil-A…doesn’t matter. If there’s a boot nearby, he’s already halfway down polishing it. We’re not saying he’d sell us out for a gold star…but we are saying he’d ask how many stars you have first.