Hurricane Harry’s to Relocate to Texas A&M Qatar Campus

Hurricane Harry’s, a College Station dance hall and bar, has announced that they will be taking over the lease of the soon-to-be-closed Qatar campus of Texas A&M University.

The dance hall is moving to sandier pastures in Doha, looking for a new start out in the Wild, Wild East. Harry’s says the new location promises better parking opportunities for patrons along with more space for events.

Several students expressed confusion and disappointment regarding the move, including sophomore education major Wyatt Cassidy.

“I had heard that Harry’s was moving, but does it have to move so far away?” Cassidy said. “I guess they wanted more of an Old Western desert feel, but did they forget we have all of West Texas? At least that commute would be better.”

While reactions were mixed among students, former Corp of Cadets members stationed in the Middle East were excited to hear about the move.

“I’ve really missed my days in the Corps since being deployed to Doha,” Judd Stevens, an Army officer and former cadet, said. “I’m pumped to relive the best years of my life without ever having to go back to the States.”

Representatives from both Hurricane Harry’s and the Texas A&M University System have vehemently denied connections between this sudden news and the recent nuclear technology controversy surrounding the closing of the Qatar campus, and they’ve reassured stakeholders that their intentions are purely related to “spreading the joys” of American country-western music to the Middle East.

While Harry’s plans to add mocktails and other non-alcoholic beverages to their menu to accommodate their new community, they still expect their clientele to mostly be Aggies desperate for the experience of standing awkwardly by the dance floor and drinking too much.

— Much Alamo About Nothing and MSGlee