Tap-Dancing Club Announces Plan to Meet in Apartment Above You

In a devastating blow to all who enjoy peace, your upstairs neighbor, Tina Andrews, has announced her presidency of a newly formed tap-dancing club.

“Due to scheduling constraints, all tap-dancing meetings will have to be conducted in my apartment, conveniently located on the third floor,” Andrews said. “Practices will take place at 3 a.m. as those are prime tapping hours.”

Tenants throughout the apartment complex have publicly expressed their dismay with this development.

“Not another one! Tina’s already made a heavy metal band that practices in her room,” John Devey, another neighbor of Andrews, said. “Before that, she was in an acting club, and practiced the ‘I am your mother!’ monologue from Hereditary multiple times every night.”

Even those closest to Andrews do not support her most recent foray into the performing arts.

“Honestly, I’ve just given up trying to sleep,” Andrew’s roommate, Riley Sapp, said while drinking her fifth Celsius of the day. “I’ve told Tina multiple times that I have 8:00 a.m. classes four days a week, but I don’t think she’s heard me over the sound of her tap dancing.”

Coincidentally, another club calling itself “Aggies Against Tap Shoes” was formed two days after Andrews announced her club. It has gained impressive traction, and approximately 90% of Andrews’ neighbors are currently members.

— Clone War Hymn