DIY or Die Trying: Freshmen Forced to Forge Survival Skills Amidst Fish Camp Budget Cuts

Citing budget cuts and a new focus on independent student development, Texas A&M University’s longstanding tradition of Fish Camp has announced a drastic shift in strategy: freshmen will now organize their own camping experience.

“The era of coddling our fish with transportation and prepared meals is over,” Blake Carson, the camp director, said. “It’s time our new Aggies learn the true meaning of self-reliance, the Aggie Spirit, and wilderness survival.”

Freshmen are now expected to arrive at the remote campsite with tents, food, and basic survival skills. The revised Fish Camp itinerary replaces mixers and bonding activities with practical workshops on first aid and “Purifying Water From Your Tears,” all led by now unpaid camp counselors.

The announcement has drawn mixed reactions from the community, with excitement coming from incoming freshmen and Bear Grylls fan, Bailey Daniels. Her mother, Heather Daniels, was a bit more concerned.

“She got lost in the backyard last summer,” Daniels said. “Now, we’re sending her into the wilderness with a map?”

While the new Fish Camp model might seem daunting, it is clear that Texas A&M is committed to teaching its students the value of independence, resilience, and a good compass. As the saying goes, “From the outside looking in, you can’t understand it. And from the inside looking out, you can’t explain it.” Especially if you’re lost in the woods.

– 8:30 P.M. Yell