After Reading Original Work, Professor Wishes Students Would Just Use ChatGPT

Concerns surrounding AI-assisted cheating are at an all time high, but English professor Daniel Kubrick welcomes the use of tools like Chat-GPT in his ENGL-210 class because he believes being forced to read the original thoughts of his students might actually kill him.

“If you had to read the reports of hundreds of engineers every semester, you’d welcome the artificial intelligence apocalypse too,” Kubrick said. “I won a grant from the Department of Defense last year for suggesting they start using my students’ essays as a form of torture in interrogations.”

Kubrick is not an isolated case. Professors spanning over 40 departments across every college at Texas A&M have unified to form the “What Am I Even Looking At?” League (WAIELAL). The organization is “dedicated to improving the education system by taking students out of it.”

“I’ve never had a single student care about me,” Dr. Bo Jackson, a professor of veterinary medicine and co-founder of WAIELAL, said. “I’m just returning the favor. Use ChatGPT. Use Chegg. But don’t come crying to me when corporate America replaces you with AI.”

Not all faculty agree with Kubrick’s assessment. According to Kubrick, many of his peers still hold “outdated” beliefs about teaching such as “caring” about the students and wanting “what’s best for them.” These disagreements were aired out publicly in a recent debate hosted by WAIELAL.

“I just think there’s a better way to engage with students than letting them cheat on everything,” Dr. Brittany Williams, a sociology professor and staunch opponent of WAIELAL, said. “It’s our job as educators to inspire our students to reach new heights.”

“Oh! That’s hilarious!” Kubrick said in response to Williams’ statement. “Wait. You’re serious?”

The debate ended in controversy and without resolution when Kubrick exposed Williams’ use of ChatGPT to craft her arguments.

— BTHO Rabies