Devout Student Creates Unique Bible Verse Caption Generator
After a devastating semester of overused Bible verses littering the captions of Christian women’s Instagram posts, devout Texas A&M computer science student Caitlyn Warner took matters into her own hands and programmed a “Unique Bible Verse Caption Generator.”
Warner is set to graduate this May and fears other women posting their senior pictures with the same Bible verse she took 20 minutes to pick out. To remedy this universal issue for Christian women, she took initiative and developed UBVCG (Unique Bible Verse Caption Generator). She hopes that UBVCG will reach Christian women all around the world and solve the age-old issue of repeated verses on social media posts.
“I had been planning my graduation post for weeks, and I finally decided upon the perfect caption. But after seeing three other girls quoting Proverbs 16:3 in their posts, I felt shocked and humiliated. I don’t want to be like everyone else. Nobody should have to go through the same struggle of basic performative Christianity ever again,” Warner said.
The program has a database of 23,000 verses, and will soon be adding the New Testament. Warner and fellow Christian women are excited for this breakthrough technology and look forward to the unique personalities they can now claim through their selected Bible verses.
—BIMS and Snap
One day after a particularly rough organic chemistry lab, BIMS and Snap needed a pick-me-up. After haphazardly driving her black, convertible Porsche down Texas Avenue, she screeched into the parking lot of the vet school, certain that a new sweatshirt from the College of Veterinary Medicine and Biomedical Sciences store would do the trick. As she was walking into VIDI, she saw an absolute hunk of a third-year vet student in a form-fitting white lab coat. Unsure of what to do, BIMS and Snap threw her lab goggles to the ground, dropped to grab them, and quickly snapped back up, hoping to get the vet student’s attention. Since the world is not like “Legally Blonde,” the vet student called CAPS, who recommended that BIMS and Snap channel her need for attention into something a little more productive, like satirical journalism.