Org Member Betrays Friends by Being Unable to Afford Ski Trip
Earlier this month, Sigma Epsilon Chi member Jason Sanders betrayed his fraternity brothers by being unable to afford the organization’s annual Colorado ski trip. Sanders, who works full time during the semester to pay for his fraternity’s dues, showed his friends that they mean nothing to him when he declined to take out loans to pay for the trip.
Sanders, who missed out on lore that will be discussed within the fraternity for years, was reportedly unable to get off work from his job at the Amazon plant in his hometown. However, members of Sigma Epsilon have made clear that this decision will absolutely affect their relationship with Sanders going forward. “He showed his true colors over winter break,” Seth Danmier, a member of Sanders’s fraternity, said. “He surely knew that countless inside jokes, which will be referenced throughout the semester, would come about during this trip, but apparently that meant less to Jason than paying tuition.”
According to reports from Sigma Epsilon’s social media director, Andrew Petro, Sanders’s online presence will reportedly suffer heavily as a result of being tagged in zero ski Instagram posts. “He’s going to have no recognition at date parties.”
— MSC ALITTLE
You’ve seen him, the phantom of the Memorial Student Center, lurking in the back of the lunch crowd. Perhaps you caught a glimpse of him darting in and out of various conference rooms. MSC ALITTLE is the CEO of overcommitment, and a sucker for any organization with a pithy acronym. His motives are a mystery. Clout chasing? Resume building? Maybe he just really likes the food at Rev’s. Whatever the case, we count ourselves lucky to be swept away to his lair in the basement, to be tutored in time management and seizing the day.