Mugdown Writer Can’t Believe They Have To Do This Shit Again

With the end of winter break, writers for The Mugdown are returning to campus for the spring semester. In addition to taking classes, the writers are expected to produce satirical content for the organization they willingly joined. Thanks and Gag ‘Em, a tenured writer within the organization, is reportedly struggling to readjust to the grueling expectations of membership.

“It’s just really hard to sit down and write three paragraphs making fun of other people,” said Gag ‘Em, who once published a record-breaking 14 articles in one semester. “I know I only have to produce three or four articles a semester, and that I joined this organization under my own volition and knowing the requirements to maintain membership, but it —

You know what? I’m not even going to pretend that this is an article anymore. Maybe I started writing this as a thinly veiled attempt to make some point that we put a lot of work into this silly little organization and it can get a little tiresome, but let’s drop the pretense and acknowledge that I just want to complain.

Every semester is the same. Once a month, I write some meaningless little piece that maybe 30 people look at. I send the link to the article to my mom, and she thinks it’s great. Maybe you’ll look at it and send it to one of your roommates. Maybe I’ll even get the thrill of one of my friends showing me my own article. But you know what? I’m tired. We’re tired. I just refused to use critical thought for five consecutive weeks and now I have to think up some drivel about bootchasers or Fish Camp again?

In reality, though, it’s not that much work when you really think about it. Maybe The Batt would have you think we slave for hours over every excruciating detail, hoping against hope that a big broadcast will use our picture so we can tweet about it. Sometimes writer’s block will get you, but I guess it’s not that hard to sit down and write a piece about how beige campus is.

And you know what?  It feels amazing when I see the social media likes on my pieces. It feels so goddamn good to get the validation of people that I don’t even know. The thrill I get when I’m sitting at my dining room table and one of my roommates comes and shows me something I wrote about Greek Life is unparalleled. Shoot, sometimes I work on articles in the Flag Room, just to see if anyone will notice. I am exclusively here for the attention, and by God, do I love it.

So yeah, it can get a little repetitive. Maybe sometimes I would rather do anything other than write. But I signed up to do this, so I’ll be damned if I’m not going to get the attention I deserve for it. Happy spring, readers.  I hope you enjoy what we have for you this semester.

 

— Flash it Back, Ags