Thursday, November 21, 2024
Texas A&M's First Satirical Newspaper, Since 1875


College of Agriculture and Life Sciences Creates Real-Life Stardew Valley Major

By Mugdown Staff , in Campus Life , at November 2, 2021 Tags: , , , , , ,

This fall, Texas A&M University officials opened enrollment for the new Stardew Valley major in the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences. This change expands the college’s offerings to 35 degree programs and is intended as an option for fans of the popular Stardew Valley video game who want to take part in the AgriLife experience without any of the manual labor.

The new major offers students an interdisciplinary survey of the basic concepts of agricultural science with a virtual twist to keep students engaged. The major boasts a thorough approach to topics such as foraging, mining, seashell collection, and courtship and marriage. It also includes courses such as POSC 201 and SLIME 305. Most classes in the major are graded based on four tests, which evaluate the efficiency of each student’s farm in the winter, spring, summer, and fall. Along with the class hour requirement for the major, there is an in-game requirement of 500 hours in order to graduate.

Earlier today, Mugdown correspondents met with freshman Harlee Kirkland to discuss her experience in the new major and her future in the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences. According to Kirkland, the program is just like Stardew Valley, but in real life.

“There’s this guy in my AGLS 101 class who I’ve been talking to nonstop,” Kirkland said. “I started giving him a stick of butter every Tuesday and Thursday, so I think he’ll be ready for me to pop the question within about 14 months.”

The Stardew Valley major is reported to be a challenging degree plan, but GPA is not among Kirkland’s concerns. Kirkland’s grandfather reportedly owns a large property upstate which she plans to inherit, so she claims to be unconcerned about future career plans. After each semester, Kirkland will learn a specialized skill, eventually graduating with a fully “leveled-up” transcript.

In the future, the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences also plans to eventually open graduate-level courses for students looking to maximize their perfection score.

 

— Plaid Libs & Squat Pilgrim