Top 10 Campus Piss Corners
We’ve all heard of the “poo with a view” on the third floor of the Academic Building, but what about going #1? Any Aggie can appreciate a good whiz, so here are the top ten places on campus to relieve yourself after that painfully long 75-minute class when you just can’t hold it any longer.
10. The Pendulum in the Mitchell Physics Building
It may be a moving target, but who doesn’t like a challenge? If you’re in Mitchell already, you’re probably working on your projectile motion anyway. For extra difficulty, aim from one of the higher floors.
9. Off of the Ocean & Meteorology Building
As the tallest building on campus, no view can compare to the roof of the Ocean and Meteorology Building. Someone check the doppler radar, there’s a chance of rain!
8. The Golf Club at Texas A&M
Coming in at 8th place and undoubtedly our most environmentally unsustainable piss spot on campus, the Texas A&M campus golf course also provides you with the most options for where you do your business. Did you know it takes 580 sprinklers that each require over 1000 gallons per minute to water the campus golf course? Every little bit counts!
7. Hullabaloo Hall
As the premiere Texas A&M residence hall, Hullabaloo Hall allows you to pick up your mail, get your Starbucks fix, and hit the loo without ever leaving the comfort of air-conditioned luxury. Relax your mind and bladder to the rhythmic sound of freshmen playing ping pong in the distance.
6. The Quad
If it’s good enough for the Queen of Aggieland, it’s good enough for you. You’ve probably heard this already, but tradition actually dictates that if Miss Rev pees in her handler’s bed, he has to pee on the floor.
5. Rec Center Olympic Pool
Legend has it that rocking one in a pool spreads blue like van Gogh’s Starry Night. We don’t want to spoil it here, but we strongly encourage every Aggie to spread the love (and warmth) with their more athletic peers down at the Rec.
4. Flag Room Piano
A long time ago, one Aggie left a note taped to the flag room piano while he was playing. It read, “If I get distracted playing and it’s past noon, let me know, so I don’t miss my class.” Well, at 12:15, George W. Bush happened to be visiting the A&M and passed through the MSC. He noticed the Aggie’s note and, to notify him of the time, dropped his presidential trousers, faced the music, and gave the original filibuster. The student noticed the keys no longer sounded the same, realized the time, shook the president’s hand, and ran to class. Nowadays, students— bringing a new meaning to the phrase— “shake the president’s hand” on the flag room piano, whether someone leaves a note or not.
3. The Texas A&M Water Tower
After an exhausting climb, chug a gallon of water and wait half an hour. It’s like a giant toilet bowl; the sound is satisfying and lends an air of gravitas. Don’t worry about poisoning the waterhole; the water will get filtered again before anyone drinks it. Probably.
2. Blocker Carpet
It may seem like a waste tinkling somewhere that’s been marinating in whiz since the sewage last overflowed. It may seem like a drop in a bucket; no real reward, no real impact draining the lizard in a packed herpetarium. But trust us, Room 128 (remember? The one with your old diff eq section?) offers sanctuary like no other.
`1. Sully Statue
That’s praxis, baby.
— Plaidlibs & Anime Sciences
