Doctors HATE Her! Find out How This Senior Looks Young on Campus
Have you ever been taking a stroll through campus when you were suddenly hit with the realization that you are, in fact, aging toward your inevitable death? Do you feel like your metabolism is slowing down, that wrinkles will creep over your features until you are unrecognizable from your current self, or that maybe, just maybe, you miss the youthful thrill of being carded at Specs? Well, if this sounds like you, YOU’RE IN LUCK!.
Scroll down to find out what this Texas A&M senior did to look young again on campus.
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Senior Kaleena Kash has just the tip for tricking your peers into thinking you’re younger. After using this amazing method, she received all the attention on campus she’d been craving. Check out this great method, SUPPORTED BY SCIENCE, below.
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“Honestly, this method is life-changing,” Kash said. “I have a new, hot boyfriend. I was given a great on-campus job. I was even accepted into organizations I didn’t think I qualified for!”
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So, what is this amazing, youth revitalizing scientific breakthrough? Here it is….
“Don’t wear your Aggie ring on campus!” says Kash. “I got into a FLO and am constantly getting flagged down by banner holders on campus. I’ve even started feeling excited about going to class again. Honestly, I’ve never felt more alive. Better yet, no one knows that I’m graduating in just two months.”
There you have it! After years of searching, Texas A&M students finally have access to the fountain of youth. Use this power wisely!
— The Maroon Scare
Remember that time you were walking on campus at night and saw a dark figure lurking by the main campus Aggie Express? You felt your hand twitch towards your phone, tempted to call the Corps Escort service or UPD. You began to sweat, wondering if you were just imagining the shrouded body. Don’t worry, that was just The Maroon Scare, an enigma within The Mugdown. Rumor has it, if you catch sight of The Maroon Scare on campus, you will not be engaged by the time you graduate.