‘Following the Rules Doesn’t Mean We Can’t Have Fun!’ Says Student Not Following Rules
Following a discussion with his roommate about COVID-19 rules and regulations, junior economics major Phillip Lawler claimed that following Texas A&M University rules and CDC guidelines does not mean there are no fun things left to do. Lawler boldly asserted this despite having made no significant changes to his behavior other than the mandatory quarantine in the spring.
“Everyone is acting like this is the end of the world,” Lawler said, describing lifestyle changes made due to the coronavirus pandemic. “But we can still hang out with friends as long as we wear a mask and social distance.” Lawler attended two Halloween parties last weekend without a mask and attended an indoor election viewing party earlier this week.
Though Lawler has made few changes to his social interactions this semester, he has avoided making any social media posts without masks. Additionally, in any conversation about COVID-19 guidelines, he will make references to “those people who just can’t seem to take this virus seriously.”
When asked what he would do if he tests positive for COVID-19, Lawler said, “I’ll probably just be asymptomatic. Besides, I’m only around other college students. I won’t be giving it to anyone that is at-risk.”
After classes end, Lawler is excited to see his parents and extended family for Thanksgiving and winter break.
— Anime Sciences
Treading silently through the Kleberg Center amongst the yeeyees and horse girls, we find Anime Sciences making his way to class with his head bowed. An inattentive freshmen accidentally walks into him, and suddenly the crowded hallway goes hush. A mind-bendingly long series of close-ups, confused grunts, and angry growls signals the triggering of Anime Sciences’ wrath as he unsheathes his katana from its holster. Uttering a rapid flurry of insults in English that somehow don’t match the movement of his lips, he challenges the freshman to either flee or face certain death. The fish scampers off. Order is restored in West Campus.