Reveille Returns to Hometown Puppy Mill

Like many Texas A&M students, Reveille returned home this month to be with her family and finish her spring semester at her childhood puppy farm.

In addition to the current global health crisis, the purebred family of Reveille IX has been struggling with health problems for years. Many family members suffer from diseases such as Collie Eye Anomaly (CEA), an untreatable genetic defect that impacts the majority of rough collies, rendering them blind. Despite this, the family shows no sign of slowing down their breeding plans as they strive to be the first to have two offspring bearing the title of “Reveille.”

“You could say we’re a pretty tight-knit family,” said a family member of Reveille, scratching skin lesions from a lifetime of autoimmune issues. “I think the fact that we were all cousins before we had litters together just brings us closer, which is something I think we all need right now.”

Though Reveille has yet to show any signs of illness or disease, she has had other issues. According to classmates, having to help out her family has negatively affected Miss Rev’s already poor grades, as she is struggling in her public speaking course. Reveille has reportedly filed for S/U grading for the course, citing her university-funded ventriculocordectomy for her underperformance. When The Mugdown reached out, she was unable to comment.

 

— Plaidlibs