Rec Center Employment Converted Into Exclusive Student Organization
According to the Department of Student Activities, employees of the Student Recreation Center have officially started their own student organization.
Newly elected Rec Organization President Marsha Hollingsworth commented on the developing situation. “We hang out together, we complain about the same things, so we might as well put a name on it, right?”
Their organization requirements can be found written in a pre-workout stained notebook laying outside of the Smoothie King. To be in good standing with the organization, members must meet the following requirements: regularly complain to at least three friends about how shitty your work schedule is, maintain an 80% eye contact avoidance rate while working the Help Desk, and ban at least four students weekly for using someone else’s student ID.
The new Rec Organization is deciding between two unofficial names, “Get Rec’d” or “Rec-ing Crew,” both of which were stolen from intramural teams this fall. Their mission statement reads “To talk amongst ourselves about how much we hate it here, and, if we must, to support the Aggie Family’s physical endeavors.”
— Maroon Gloat
Every single night before she goes to bed, Maroon Gloat plans her outfit for the next day. She gets cold easily and needs something to constantly insulate her. She has tried jackets, pullovers, and even shawls, but nothing keeps her warm like coats. One day, she discovered reds and purples looked best on her — specifically maroon. She wears maroon with such confidence that it’s now become her trademark. Rumour has it you can find her driving golf carts during campus tours… there’s even a football game honoring how good it looks on her.