Combating Toxic Masculinity, Corps Places Females in Every Leadership Position

In a recent attempt to staunch toxic masculinity, the Commandant’s Office placed a female cadet in every single leadership position on the Quad from Outfit Guidon to Corps Commander. The change will come into effect October 28th to demonstrate that the Commandant’s Staff values equality. Due to females only representing 12-20% of the Corps population, some positions remain unfilled as there were not enough active female cadets to fill them. 

“We have a culture problem in the Corps, definitely,” said General Ramirez when asked why he decided to enact the changes. “The best antidote for that cultural disease is an influx of female leadership starting from the top down. As of right now, 20% of our leadership positions remain vacant, but we are maintaining dialogue with multiple female non-regs that would be willing to join the Corps of Cadets to fill those leadership positions.” 

The only aspect of the Corps of Cadets that remains unaffected by changes are the eight all-male units represented in each military Reserve Officer Training Corps branch. They will continue to have male unit leadership for an indefinite amount of time. In 1990, the Corps of Cadets made the decision to integrate females into all units of the Corps, but these eight units still remain unintegrated thirty years later. When questioned about the status of the all-male units, General Ramirez mumbled “alumni” and “donations,” but he refused to expand further. 

“If they were to integrate my outfit [E-3], do you know how many donations would be pulled from the Corps of Cadets Association and the university as a whole?” said Jeb Marshall, a current all-male Unit Commander. “The Commandant’s Office won’t ever touch us no matter what platform they’re putting on for the university. Our alumni give the big bucks, and no amount of wag empowerment can change that.”

 

⁠—Buffalo Wild Wags