Coup Places Corps Commander as Student Body President

Recently, Corps Commander Luke Thomas usurped Mikey Jaillet in a coup staged by a secret society called The Maroon Legion (TML). In a three minute video released on Texas A&M’s official Twitter page and The Battalion’s website, Mikey Jaillet ceded Student Body President (SBP) responsibilities to Thomas on the grounds that he was thoroughly convinced that a member of the Corps of Cadets was better suited to run the university. Though there were no weapons in the video, the University Police Department is investigating potential foul play. 

TML posted a meme to their website (put-your-ring-on-your-left-hand.com) following the coup, claiming that it had been in the works since Luke Thomas’ initiation as a senior in high school. The quiet nature of the coup has caused the student body to question where their allegiances lie. 

“Was Jaillet the ones with the glowsticks?” said Derek Middlesome, a fifth-year construction science major. “Because I honestly would trust a Corps dude over some non-reg. I don’t know, there’s just something reassuring about a guy in uniform.” 

This is the most public action yet by a secret society at Texas A&M University. Typically, The Maroon Legion is known for placing men in influential positions, such as yell leaders, Big Event Coordinator or even Corps Commander. As TML continues to exert its influence, pushback from other powerful organizations is expected. 

As soon as Thomas reached the President’s office, he promoted his Deputy Corps Commander and invoked martial law, maintaining that the University had suffered without a heavy executive hand. Thomas’ first actions as SBP were to make Corps of Cadets enrollment compulsory, as well as to conduct a mandatory “test of Texas A&M traditions” for every returning student to ensure they are knowledgeable enough on the history of the university to attend this beloved institution. 

 

⁠—Buffalo Wild Wags