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Texas A&M's First Satirical Newspaper, Since 1875


Student Dreads Visit from Loving Family

By Howdy Boo Boo , in Local News , at April 11, 2019 Tags: , , , ,

Senior ocean engineering major Jenny McKean was enjoying her last semester of college when her parents called to tell her they were coming to College Station for Ring Day, forcing her to entertain them for three consecutive days.

The McKean family lives out of state and only gets to see their daughter a few times year. Proud of her 3.92 GPA and recent acceptance of an exciting job, the McKeans wanted to spend some precious time with their daughter before she leaves the nest.

Jenny McKean, knowing that there are only so many hours a day that they can go eat at restaurants together, began to desperately think of things she could do with her parents. Her short list included a second trip to the local George Bush Presidential Museum, yet another stroll across the few scenic parts of campus, and even a trip to nearby, man-made Lake Bryan. Bystanders noted that McKean became visually stressed wondering how to keep them busy for their visit.

Mr. and Mrs. McKean, blissfully unaware that these last few months of college marked the end of an era for their daughter who desperately wanted to make the most of the few moments she has left, had already booked their flights from their residence in Alexandria, Virginia.

“I guess we can get a reservation at Christopher’s,” McKean allegedly told her parents on the phone after receiving the news. “And maybe Fargo’s on Saturday. I don’t know, there isn’t a lot to do here that doesn’t involve drinking with your friends, and we’ve sort of already done it all.”

“Oh nonsense, sweetheart!” said Mrs. McKean, genuinely looking forward to seeing her daughter, “We don’t need anything fancy, just a little bit of time with you!”

McKean reportedly rolled her eyes as she told her parents she loved them, dreading the long hours of awkwardness between scheduled activities that would ultimately result in sitting silently in her living room.

 

—Howdy Boo Boo