TAMU Student Finds Purpose in Belittling Blinn Students
Every year, new freshmen come to College Station to attend Texas A&M. Often, they have friends who end up in the desolate wasteland of Bryan, at the institution colloquially know as “Blinndergarten.”
“I want to preface this by saying I am extremely smart,” said Ben Novak, freshman communication major, when commenting on his status as a Texas A&M student. Novak, leader of a new movement that seeks to put Blinn students in their place, believes that his test-taking skills and his high school leadership experience helped him stand out when applying to Texas A&M, and that his friends who attend Blinn simply do not have the same abilities. “There is a clear divide between me and my friends that ‘decided’ to go to Blinn,” said Novak. “They are lazy and stupid, but usually blame it on ‘saving money’ or something like that.”
Many Blinn students live in fear of people like Novak and his followers as they try to participate in activities around College Station. Blinn freshman Lany Svoboda, excited to finally attend Midnight Yell with her friends, found herself being chastised by a member of Novak’s regime. “The whole time I was there this guy was yelling at me, saying I didn’t deserve to participate the traditions reserved for his school,” said Svoboda. “I planned on transferring to Mays Business School next fall, but I’m not sure I want to be part of such a cruel student body.”
Even outside of A&M events, Blinn students have become victims of the TAMU supremacists. One Blinn sophomore was dancing at Harry’s with a TAMU student and, when he found out she was a Blinn student, he intentionally dropped her during a dip and then hurried away.
While the university has tried to improve relations with students at Blinn, many TAMU students still refuse the idea of someday sitting in a classroom with a former Blinn student. “I understand that some Blinn students will eventually transfer to A&M, but I will not count them as real Aggies, sports pass or not,” said Novak.
For the time being, Blinn students will just have to stay under the radar while they work hard to be successful.
—12th Man Bowels
It’s the middle of the third quarter, and those nachos you ate after tailgating aren’t sitting too well. You can’t stand it, and you make the long trek to the nearest Kyle Field bathroom. You make it in the nick of time…but the water isn’t running! You’ve heard the legend of 12th Man Bowels…but is he real? If he is, will he answer? You call on him, but nothing happens. Just as you begin to despair, as if on cue, water burst through the pipes. Toilets flush, hands may be washed, and you know, even though you can’t see him, 12th Man Bowels is with you…he is always with you.