Students Dunk Rings in Massive Piles of Cocaine
For decades, students at Texas A&M have been participating in ring dunks. The way a ring dunk looks has evolved over the years, but the spirit behind the tradition has remained the same. These days, most students opt to dunk their ring from the bottom of a giant pile of cocaine.
“The whole experience is quite the rush,” said Ryan Ardman, a senior marketing major. “You bury your ring in a pile of blow, and then you’ve got to do hit after hit until you finally get to your ring. I invited all of my friends and family to my ring dunk, and my parents even took a video that you can see on my Facebook.”
Ardman was initially unsure about dunking from a mound of coke, but he gained confidence by practicing on a few occasions leading up to the big day. “If you can just set your mind to it, it’s not too bad,” said Adams. “Leaving it out overnight before your big day can help the coke settle a bit, making it easier to ingest quickly. Just make sure you choose a cut of cocaine that you’re not too fond of, because you probably won’t want to snort that type ever again.”
Some students are a bit more hesitant to participate in this tradition. Sarika Hammond, a junior biology major, took a while to get comfortable with the idea.
“I just don’t understand why it has to be an entire pile of cocaine. Why can’t it just be one line?” said Hammond. “For a while I didn’t think I was going to dunk. I don’t even like cocaine. But then, all of my best friends planned a ring dunk together. I wanted to dunk with them, so I sucked it up and snorted a pile of powder. I ended up having the fastest time at my ring dunk, and I was so high for the rest of the party.”
The university does not officially condone dunking your ring from a massive mound of cocaine, but it encourages students to engage in all of the rich traditions beloved by Aggies. Rolled up dollar bills and razor blades bearing the Texas A&M logo can even be found for sale in the MSC bookstore. Some students, like freshman Andrew Martinez, still have a hard time buying into the hype.
“I just don’t understand why anyone would ever want to dunk their ring in cocaine,” said Martinez, shaking his head in confusion. “Everyone I’ve ever talked to acts like they don’t want to do it, but then they do it anyways. I guess by the time I get my ring I’ll probably end up dunking it in cocaine, too. Aggies have been doing it for forever, after all.”
—InterYellar
We mostly just want to say we have had a yell leader on staff, so we picked out a freshman and have plans to train him up real good until his time comes. He types most of his articles with his nose while doing pushups and screaming the answers to grammar quizzes, so we have high hopes for the kid. You could even say he is…out of this world.