Thursday, November 21, 2024
Texas A&M's First Satirical Newspaper, Since 1875


First-Ever “Bootchaser 5K” to be Held This Spring

By 5K for Yell , in Corps of Cadets , at April 10, 2017 Tags: , , ,

The Corps of Cadets is proud to announce that it will be holding its first annual “Boot Chaser 5K” this spring.

 

About The Race:

Since 1964, when the first females were admitted into Texas A&M University, catching the eye of a man in boots has been the deepest desire and main aspiration for any proper Aggie woman. In recent years, however, the true art of boot chasing has become a rarity. To combat this growing deficit, the Corps of Cadets is starting a new tradition: the “Boot Chaser 5K”.

 

The Course:

The race course is simple, but effective. It consists of multiple laps around the Quad, allowing the participants to have maximum exposure and visibility. The race will commence with a fire of the canon and a Fighting Texas Aggie Yell Practice. (The Yell Leaders, upon completion of their final yell, will swiftly flee the area to ensure safety from aggressive fangirling.)  The course will include water stations every half mile,  staffed by extra motivating cadets to provide inspiration for the particularly thirsty female and male racers. The revival of bootchasing was originally intended for women, but in an effort to promote gender equality, the Corps has determined that anyone can qualify as a bootchaser for the event.

 

The Finish Line:

To provide participants with the best and most iconic finish line experience, they will complete the race through the Quad’s front arches. As racers approach the finish line, they will run through a saber arch configured by boot-wearing senior cadets. All finishers will be encouraged to tap the “Return with Honor” pillar as they complete the course. This symbolizes the necessity for each woman to keep her virtue and honor perfectly preserved for her future strapping, all-American cadet.

 

Finisher’s Village:

Once complete, each finisher will be handed a maroon carnation as well as a pass to enter the Quad during non-visiting hours. The post-race reception will be held in Duncan dining hall with an assortment of beige food that vaguely resembles subpar microwavable meals.

 

Medalist:

The lucky women who have proven themselves in the art of bootchasing will not go home empty handed.

First Place – Guaranteed dates to all Midnight Yells (one including a Yell Leader as an escort)

Second Place – Complimentary Duncan Meal swipes for the remainder of the year

Third Place – A posed picture with a yell leader that gives the impression of a steady relationship (possessive hands encouraged)

The first place finisher in the men’s division will win an unrestricted weekend with the wag of his choice.

 

Thanks, Gig’em, and Happy Boot-chasing!

—5K For Yell