Student Counseling Offers Drive-Thru Service
In response to criticism towards accessibility of professional counseling on campus, Texas A&M Student Counseling Services (SCS) has opened a drive-thru for students seeking help in a hurry.
The groundbreaking service, launched as Get Help To-Go, will operate during regular office hours next to SCS’s temporary location at White Creek. Students unwilling to wait for weeks to set an initial appointment can simply pull up to the window where a passionate, underpaid, and overworked doctoral candidate will provide brief vocational and/or psychological support. Students will be advised to condense their stories of career concerns or childhood trauma into a five-minute monologue to keep the line moving.
The Texas A&M Board of Regents released a brief statement endorsing the drive-thru.
“Texas A&M prides itself on being a fearless leader on every front, and that includes providing the best counseling service we can to our students. When our research suggested that the best wasn’t being provided (and that, surprisingly, football could not cure depression), we made necessary adjustments.”
While students appreciate the speedy service and not paying for parking, the drive-thru has its share of critics. Junior Phil Ingham said his session was cut painfully short.
“I was halfway through processing my abandonment issues when the counselor said ‘I’m so sorry, we don’t have the budget to continue this session’ and closed the window,” said Ingham. “It’s fine. It’s not the first time I’ve been cut off from a male figure in my life.”
—Hullakazoo
If you have ever attended Midnight Yell, you have unknowingly seen Hullakazoo. He marches in amongst the band wearing a Walmart army man Halloween costume whilst blasting his shrill kazoo into the midnight sky over Aggieland. You may hear his kazoo echoing down the halls of Evans library late at night, but you will never find him. Thankfully we are the only ones who could corner him and got him to join us and say some funny stuff every so often. The kazoo playing is really starting to bug us though.