Well, we hope you are proud of yourselves, you depraved collection of inglorious nymphomaniacs. Our intern quit after losing all hope in humanity from reading the depths of degeneracy on campus. Enjoy your own deplorable display of bizarre deviance in the dorms.
With that, there is only one more thing to say: Happy Valentine’s Day!
“I know a dorm is probably the most boring answer but there is some sort of delicious irony in having gay sex in a corps dorm.”
“I don’t wanna go into detail, but if you ever find a used condom on the underside of a table in a private study room in Evans, you’re welcome.”