Professor Convinced i>Clickers are Path to Salvation Professor Convinced i>Clickers are Path to Salvation
Halfway through his Tuesday morning Chemistry lecture, Dr. Gonzalez smirked as he decided to test his students’ knowledge of strong and weak acids with... Professor Convinced i>Clickers are Path to Salvation

Halfway through his Tuesday morning Chemistry lecture, Dr. Gonzalez smirked as he decided to test his students’ knowledge of strong and weak acids with an i>clicker quiz. After generously allotting them over three minutes to think it through, Dr. Gonzalez was dumbfounded when he saw that there were over 140 responses despite there only being at best 100 students in class.

“Obviously, I was skeptical at first – I didn’t want to believe it! But after my class promised that they did not have anyone else’s i>clicker but their own, I just knew we had made contact with some sort of spiritual being,” Gonzalez said.

In an attempt to communicate with the suspected spirit, Gonzalez stopped teaching and immediately began utilizing the i>clicker system to ask the visitor questions about death, God, the afterlife, and the ghost’s own intentions.

“It is so comforting to have the answers to all the big questions in life,” Gonzalez explained. “It is so easy now. All I had to do was come up with my top five guesses to answer my own questions, and the spirit responded every time.”

With his new peace of mind, the fifty-year-old professor quit his highly coveted and tenured position here at A&M, took out his life savings, and donated the bulk of it to numerous charities. The little he kept for himself he is now using to sustain his asceticism as he wanders around aimlessly, city to city, promoting the truths he has found – i>clicker securely in tow.  

 

-Plug Down for Watt

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Plug Down for Watt

Plug Down for Watt failed the Turing Test. I guess that means she’s a robot or a computer or something? I mean, it would explain a few things, like her perfect spelling and math skills, but she has a heart that no computer could ever have. Plug’s too funny to be a computer anyways! So maybe she’s a cyborg. A cyborg who’s on our side.

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