Millennials Kill New Army

Millennials Kill New Army Hot

Campus Life October 13, 2017 0

Early on Friday morning, President Michael K. Young, Chancellor John Sharp, and Student Body President Bobby Brooks held a joint press conference to announce the death of New Army. For years, former students and upperclassmen alike have mourned the death of Old Army, including the bygone days of hazing,... Read more
Students in Long Term Relationships Defer Commitment Issues to Senior Year
Junior finance major Braxton Bolton and junior petroleum engineering major Rachel Descartes have been dating since freshman year. They met at a party between their two FLOs and ended up dating soon after. Both are well liked, athletic, and high achieving, and most people think the relationship is destined... Read more
Involved Student Admits to Hating Logie’s, Loses All Friends
Junior accounting major Braydon McAdams had it all. He was the Head Director of FLiP. He served as a Fish Camp counselor in two consecutive face camps and was on track to become a chair and make a face camp of his very own. He was accepted into Century... Read more
How the Mob, as Transportation Services, Extorts Campus
The Mafia has taken root at Texas A&M. In a shocking revelation, The Mugdown discovered that the Mob has taken over Transportation Services and set up a massive extortion operation that relies on revenues from parking tickets and parking permits. The Mob, under the leadership of Don Goodfella, who... Read more
Upperclassmen Upset The Commons Actually Livable
When The Commons began its two-year renovation, it sent shockwaves through the on-campus culture, forcing South Side students to walk all the way to the MSC or, worse, Sbisa, for food and entertainment. The reopening of the Commons is a monumental shift in the pace of on-campus life. However,... Read more
Student Body and Fans Call on Kevin Sumlin to Q-Drop Screen Passes
On the last day to Q-drop classes, a large number of students and Aggie Football fans have called upon Head Coach Kevin Sumlin to use one of his university allotted Q-drops to drop screen passes from the offensive playbook. The grassroots movement, named “Please Run Better Plays,” draws support... Read more
Petroleum Engineering Students Outraged After Liberal Arts Student Receives Paid Internship
Protests rocked the east side of campus today as news that a Liberal Arts major was hired for a well-paid internship, while petroleum engineering majors are still without internships and jobs. Junior English major Sarah Oliver received an offer from a well-known consulting firm because of her “analytical and... Read more