Confused Ol’ Ag Breaks Into Kyle Field for Midnight Yell
With the Texas A&M spring Parents’ Weekend coming this weekend, the university wishes to give Aggie parents the best experience possible. A trademark tradition in Aggieland is the beloved Midnight Yell Practice, a surprisingly popular event amongst older generations who have not seen midnight in decades. Traditionally, Yell Leaders... Read more
The 15 Dunks That You Will Definitely Be Invited To
So, it’s Ring Day tomorrow and odds are your Facebook event invitations list is filled to the brim with pun-filled Ring Dunk invites from all your buds. We found the best 15 Ring Dunks going down this weekend and you better make all of them – or at yeast... Read more
Student Starts Fraternity Run On Monarchy. Declares Himself “King of the Frat”
So long as there is a head, a student organization is free to structure itself however it sees fit. Few realize just how much freedom Texas A&M’s Department of Student Activities actually allows, better than his grace, Jeffrey of the House Bartison, King of the Pledges and the Frat... Read more
After the recent arrest of Ricky Seals-Jones for what the CSPD are calling disorderly conduct (language),  it seemed only appropriate that Sumlin’s message to the team be short, sweet, and lacking expletives. He simply lowered his sunglasses and told the players in a steady voice that, when they are... Read more
Sunday Comic – Ring Day – 4/6/2014
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Every so often, someone besides Jeff Pickering sends us mail. Most of it is coupons and various other kinds of junk mail, but sometimes we find a pearl hidden in the warzone that is HQ’s mailbox. Mugdown Reads Fan Mail is a new segment where we post some of... Read more
The Marooner’s Map
Late one night, we snuck into the forbidden section of the Cushing Memorial Library. In there. we found a staggering amount of scandalous items. Preserved neatly were about 30 KKK robes, the constitution of the True Texans/ the Stikas, and the recipe to Sbisa’s cookies. But, there was one... Read more
Student Fulfills Quest to Become Johnny Football for a Day
Everyone can remember spending full days of childhood dreaming about what life would be like as their favorite celebrity. We have all imagined life as Brittney, Michael Jordan, or some other moderately successful and probably physically attractive human being. But what would you give up for this chance? For... Read more
Student Wildly Misunderstood About OWLs
Professor Dolores Umbridge once said about OWLs, “Study hard and you will be rewarded. Fail to do so and the consequences may be . . . severe.” Dismayed to find out she had failed another OWL assignment, freshman biology major Paige Mosley, has decided she needs to find a... Read more
On-Campus Housing to be Assigned by New Harry Potter Inspired Housing System
In an attempt to solve the growing issue of on-campus student housing, Texas A&M interim president Mark Hussey has decided to take a page out of a long-beloved book. Upon a student’s acceptance into the university, they will no longer be asked in which dorm they prefer to live.... Read more