Texas A&M to Transition from Pepsi to Coca-Cola
In a move that has shocked the campus, Texas A&M University Dining has announced that it will be severing ties with PepsiCo. In its place, University administrators have awarded rival company Coca-Cola Bottlers Consolidated the exclusive right to sell products on campus. The University’s contract with PepsiCo, a multi-year... Read more
Code Maroon Lampoon!
Yesterday, January 28th, 2014 — a date which will live in obscurity — The Maroon Lampoon was suddenly and deliberately attacked by the forces of The Mugdown. The Maroon Lampoon was at peace with the rival newspaper and, at the solicitation of The Mugdown, was in conversation with The... Read more
Student Actually Reads Syllabus
College Station, TX – In a twist of events that surprised even the professor himself, it appears that a student in his Introduction to Accounting class has read the syllabus. Despite requiring this mundane assignment every year, this is the first time on record that a student has in... Read more
Corps Member Thanked for His Service
A new semester has begun at Texas A&M University, and with a new year comes an influx of visitors to the campus. Marla Campbell, the mother of a visiting high school senior, was overwhelmingly inspired by the University’s numerous men in uniform. Chad Jordan—fish—was approached by Campbell near the Quad... Read more
A&M Rebrands to Reflect Phonetics
  Prepare to see a ‘Block N’ forming on the North End of Kyle Field. Citing student confusion as the primary reason, Texas A&M University officials have decided to change their historic logo. In what is sure to be a controversial decision, officials have finally caved into phonetics. According... Read more
Cinemark Running Same Ticket Price since 1980’s
Is it time to say goodbye to four dollar movies,  Aggies? A conversation between junior economics major, Raj Panesar, and the manager of Cinemark in College Station has prompted an evaluation of ticket prices. Theodore Allen has both owned and managed the theater since 1985. He opened his theater... Read more
MSC to Become World’s First 3-Story ‘Mega Panda’
Orange chicken looks to take over the Maroon landscape. Chartwells – the company that oversees Texas A&M on-campus dining – has just confirmed that Panda Express will expand to become the first ‘Mega Panda’. After constant complaints from students of massive lines and lack of seating, Chartwells approached University... Read more
Wehner High to Field Football Team
. . . . . . The College Station football scene just got a little more interesting. Wehner High School will be holding tryouts for their new football program which will begin play in September in AAA division II. Wehner High was established in 1961 and has been consistently... Read more