Sophomore Learning Vectors for the Eighth Time Sophomore Learning Vectors for the Eighth Time
Yesterday, students in the MSC flag room witnessed Texas A&M student Jonathan Michaels bemoaning the fact that he would have to learn about vectors... Sophomore Learning Vectors for the Eighth Time

Yesterday, students in the MSC flag room witnessed Texas A&M student Jonathan Michaels bemoaning the fact that he would have to learn about vectors yet again. Michaels, a sophomore mechanical engineering major, went on to list every course that began the semester with a week of instruction on vectors.

“I just know that we’re going to go over vectors again in MEEN 225 and MATH 251,” said Michaels, “but c’mon, we’ve done this like a million times. A baby could solve these vector problems. Like we get it, there’s a direction and a magnitude, whoop-de-doo.” Other engineers sitting with Michaels nodded in zealous agreement as he continued his dismissive monologue: “I mean, we never even use vectors. Why do we have to do this? Vectors don’t even come up for the rest of the semester.”

“This kid is in for a rude awakening,” Mitchell Alterbrook said in passing, with a dark chuckle. When asked for clarification, the 5th year civil engineering student added, “Math 251 is almost entirely based on vectors; in fact, most of his classes from here on out are going to be vectorheavy. This is only the beginning.”

“Why can’t we have a free syllabus week? It would be so nice to just relax,” said Michaels, drawing rapturous applause from his robotic engineering cronies. None of them wanted to point out that mere moments earlier Michaels had been complaining about how easy vectors were and stated how “[learning about vectors] was beneath an engineer like myself.”

Despite professing an aptitude in vectors, at time of publication, Michaels was unable to explain the difference between a dot product or a cross product, saying, “Uh… It has something to do with how one’s product is a scalar and one’s still a vector, but I’m not 100% sure.”

 

—GingerbRedAss

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GingerbRedass

He definitely has more tattoos than you, but they are all inside jokes with his organizations and you will never see them unless he shows you. He wears his gameday overalls every day of the week, and only owns cowboy boots of varying levels of formality. He WILL scream his wildcat in your face, and he will not be sorry— just ask our last intern (we are actually really worried about him, if you find the poor guy please let us know).

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