Student Shot, Father Saves on Tuition Student Shot, Father Saves on Tuition
One Aggie parent is taking an early retirement after a shooter on Texas A&M’s campus killed four and injured three others. Kevin Guttman, father... Student Shot, Father Saves on Tuition

One Aggie parent is taking an early retirement after a shooter on Texas A&M’s campus killed four and injured three others. Kevin Guttman, father of deceased student Jerod Guttman, is looking forward to spending the money that would have otherwise gone to his son’s education.

Guttman said his son’s death was like “winning the lottery” except, unlike winning the lottery, there was a pretty high likelihood of this actually occurring.

“School shootings are just one of those common things,” Guttman said. “They’re accidents, nobody’s fault. It’s not like there’s anything that can be done to reduce the odds of them happening.”

Karen Hammer, mother of one of the other victims, agrees with Guttman.

“Every era has its plague— whether it’s smallpox or cholera— and I guess school shootings is ours,” said Hammer. “I’m sure someday it’ll just run its course and disappear.”

The solution is to get more students guns. The passage of Texas Senate Bill 11, which requires universities to allow the concealed carry of firearms on campus, is a great deal for local gun stores and could even bring about similar savings for other parents with additional casualties. With the average cost for one year of public college education in Texas being around $7,000, the combination of gun sales and parents saving on tuition could mean that Senate Bill 11 will really stimulate the Texas economy.

In response to the implementation of Senate Bill 11, Texas A&M will continue to not offer any gun safety classes, but will offer an array of economics and money-management classes.

“I’m just glad this happened before spring semester came around,” Guttman said. “I did not want to have to shell out the money for an Aggie ring. Have you seen the prices for those things? They’re murder.”

— Chophouse Sweater Burger

 

 

*Texas A&M has been fortunate not to experience the kind of tragedy that our nation faces on a seemingly regular basis. As a work of satire, The Mugdown wants to encourage discussion and solutions to keep this type of tragedy from occurring in the future. 
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Chophouse Sweater Burger

  • Mike Taylor

    November 23, 2015 #1 Author

    Ridiculous, distasteful, even for this usually entertaining satirical blog. I get it – you don’t like the Campus Carry law. I’m sure you don’t like the Second Amendment either; go to Syria then and see how you like having no rights and no way to defend yourself against the animals in society who prey on the innocents. When a school shooting occurs, it’s not by a sane student who has purchased a gun legally. Keeping guns out of the hands of said students only prolongs the time a shooter has to kill unarmed people before the police come to take him down. Use some common sense, and think about the real scenarios before you put up the really distasteful stuff such as this. Life experience will show you that this one was not funny.

    Reply

    • Parker

      November 23, 2015 #2 Author

      I agree with you completely. I can take the light hearted jabs. This is satirical. I get it. But this is the 3rd sarcastic BS post about campus carry I’ve seen in the last couple of weeks. Author: I’m sorry you’re not okay with people having the same rights as 20+ other states but whining about it isn’t going to help. Your not encouraging discussion, you’re ridiculing ideas without any reasoning to back it up and not offering any solutions. This site has had some good articles that I found funny, but if you can’t put your bleeding heart liberalism on hold occasionally and see things from different perspectives, it won’t be around too much longer. Until junk articles like this stops getting posted on the reg, I’m out.

      Reply

      • Jacob

        November 23, 2015 #3 Author

        So I’ve actually read all the posts in the last few weeks. Not really sure where you’re getting that they’re super liberal. They posted an article called pros and cons of campus carry (inherently two-sided), then two articles called utopia realized once all students (dis)armed which tells the story of what would happen if people were inherently good, and then today this one was with a story about some student senate guy. Maybe they’re beating a dead horse with guns, but its not like they’re forcing you to believe something, you can choose to read it how you want. Also –satire– so even if its one sided that serves the same purpose to create discussion.

        Reply

        • Mike Taylor

          November 23, 2015 #4 Author

          I’ve read all as well. The bias is toward no campus carry. The criticism of the piece today was on two levels: 1. Enough – we see your bias, and get it. Move on. 2. Maybe it’s the parent in me, but it’s hard to find humor in a piece satirizing the death of a student. That’s it.

          Reply

      • Mike Taylor

        November 23, 2015 #6 Author

        No “oops” about it. Was not my point. Pay attention, oopser…

        Reply

  • Mike Taylor

    November 23, 2015 #7 Author

    Your note above states: “*Texas A&M has been fortunate not to experience the kind of tragedy that our nation faces on a seemingly regular basis. As a work of satire, The Mugdown wants to encourage discussion and solutions to keep this type of tragedy from occurring in the future.” Here’s your solution.
    The solution is the exact same thing you are criticizing and satirizing — Campus Carry. Look to history — the students at tu pinned down Charles Whitman during his spree at the tower, ensuring that more people were not killed by him. The campus police, in fact, recruited and directed students who had their deer rifles in their dorm rooms to come help them. This enabled the policeman who shot Whitman time to get behind him and kill him. Understand this — the only thing that stops a bad guy who is shooting people with a gun is a good guy who shows up with a gun to kill him. It makes sense to have more good guys with guns around to minimize the damage done by a shooter. I challenge you smart young satire bloggers to argue that logically, and with facts to back you up. You can’t, you won’t, so move on to another subject before you lose a lot of readers who have appreciated your humor up until now.

    Reply

    • Jacob

      November 23, 2015 #8 Author

      Mike, to your last comment:
      Since when did satire have to be humor? I don’t think there is any humor in this piece and I don’t think there is supposed to be. Satire is supposed to make you feel uncomfortable. If you’re angry, you should be angry that shootings are a thing, not that some students with a blog started talking about it.

      Reply

      • Mike Taylor

        November 23, 2015 #9 Author

        Not angry, Jacob. Just giving some advice to some young wannabe columnists/bloggers: if it’s got some humor in it, you’ll hook more people. This wasn’t funny. That’s it — I love the First Amendment as much as all the rest. Just some advice — I, and I suspect others like me, who have found the Mugdown pieces entertaining and insightful, do not find this particular piece to be either. Make your satire funny, entertaining, to the point, and more people will continue to spend time on it.

        Reply

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